comedy of cats and dogs

I have a couple of new post ideas circulating, but haven't got time to write them this morning!  So here's an "oldie but goodie", originally published on my now-defunct Kwilting with Katie blog midwinter last year.  Enjoy!

It's been a wild weekend.... Just to set the stage leading up to Sunday night, our eighth-grader brought home her health class assignment, an electronic baby, on Friday. Friday night, the electronic baby was up every hour and a half. I was up every hour and a half with *my* baby who was panicking, afraid she was going to fail health class. Saturday morning, Addie, a very cute but exciteable dog that we are pet-sitting arrived. The afternoon was spent bowling with the acolytes then attempting to watch a concert that our oldest daughter was in. The electronic baby had other ideas.... Sunday, we rushed off late to church. Have I mentioned the electronic baby schedule? After church, Claire (the 8th-grader) had a friend over. Add one *more* electronic baby. Shannon (our youngest) lost a loose tooth Sunday afternoon; always a traumatic ordeal for her as she cries because the tooth is dangling by a thread but she doesn't want anyones fingers in her mouth. Our dog-on-loan spent the afternoon Sunday wedging herself between my knees and barking at every noise. Unless there was a glimpse of a cat. Then there would be a romping chase complete with barking, hissing, and spitting.

Sunday night arrives. The cats take shelter in the girls bedrooms far under the beds. The friend and extra baby go home. Claire's baby goes into a quiet schedule for a while. Addie and our dog sack out watching football with Don. And ice starts falling from the sky. Ahhhh! The perfect excuse to curl up with the girls and watch a movie we've been trying to find time to see.

All goes deceptively well until the girls go upstairs for bed. "Mom! One of the cats peed on my bed!" Right through two quilts. So... eleven-o-clock finds quilts churning in the washer and Don and I taking turns babysitting two cats and a dog in the bathroom enforcing a "get-used-to-each-other" approach. On one of my trips out of the bathroom, I discover that the tooth is *not* under the pillow. I also realize that with about a week's worth of work to go on the book proposal and a cat ignoring litterbox ettiquette, I need to remove all the quilts for the book from the house. When the enforced "time-in" for the animals ends, a big, hairy tooth fairy with a five-o-clock-shadow and a flashlight heads into the 10-year-old's room to look for a tooth while I start skating repeatedly across the driveway carrying armloads of quilts.

Just another quiet night at the Brown house....

"Hi, Baby!"

So, yeah, life is returning to normal around here.  Or semi normal.  Oldest kiddo got a kick out of my greeting when she walked into the house the other night....  "Oooooooh!  Look what I'm working on!  How was your day?  Hi, baby!"  (The last bit was addressed to the belly bump.)  Yup, talking to the bump is just part of our day now.

Actually, the kids and I joke that oldest kiddo must be pregnant with, "hi, baby!" since that is the way we all address oldest kid's tummy.  Youngest kiddo was sypathetic to the constant tummy-talking.  Just in case older sister ever found talking to the bump one sided, youngest kiddo suggested that it was ok to address *her* belly and say hello to dinner! 

Oh!  I also have a new name!  No grandma names seemed to fit me.  Sorry... but they all seemed a bit OLD.  And I refuse to utter that nasty, bad word.  Ever.  Eeeeeuw.... shivering!  The closest I could get to naming myself without gagging was G'amma.  Like taking the "r" out takes away the bad-word connotation....  But even that seemed a bit fuddy-duddy.  Until I burst out with a new idea while sitting at the table with my kidlets the other day!  I'm not just G'amma, I'm SUPER G'AMMA!!!!!  Yes, that would be "super" with a cape and mask and everything!  Ok, maybe skip the mask, it might scare the wee one.  But definitely a cape!  Like all the superheros!  Sooooo... now that I am a superhero, I can say my new name without gagging!

Super-G'amma!!!!!!

Well... that's the happy thought for today!  Or happy thoughts....  Never can seem to stick to just one!

Have a happy day!

Thanksgiving Day!

We opted for a quiet day at home this year!  After all the turmoil and confusion of the past couple of weeks, it was absolutely beautiful to enjoy a day at home with our family and just a couple of extra friends!  This is really just a "photo album" post.  More stories and humor next time!

 Smiley kiddo is still enjoying her Halloween costume!  I've always had to struggle to get her into a hat and keep it on her head long enough for her to forget that it is there.  But Smiley actually *pointed* to her zebra headgear this morning!  Here she is, ready to go pick up Grammie before our Thanksgiving feast!

Our kiddos stayed in their jammies most of the day.  And played with beads.  Even the teens....

So glad they're all grown up....

Our kid crew went for a short walk between dinner and dessert.  Not nearly a long enough walk to burn through the food consumed during the day, but, heck!  They managed to make serious inroads on dessert just the same!  (Note... smiley in the zebra hat is honing in on sassy second child's boyfriend again!)

The teen crew managed to figure out my tripod and camera timer for me!  So we actually have a photo of everyone!

 

Happy Thanksgiving from the Brown Family Crew!  Hope you had a wonderful day!



New Normal

I feel like I am emerging from a fog.  With sincere apologies for the lack of posting in the past couple of weeks.  Ummmm... several weeks.  Our family learned some BIG NEWS.  Yes, ALL CAPS BIG NEWS.  And I just wasn't ready to share.  Sooooo... now that the news is out and the fog is lifting, I'm ready to write again.  And dust and vaccuum and clean closets and rearrange furniture and shake out rugs and wash beds...  Oooops.  I diverge.  You're waiting for the news, not the to-do-list...

I'm going to be a grandma! 

Ummmm... a few years earlier than any of us anticipated.  Quite a few years earlier.  Hence the fog.  It has been a topsy turvy couple of weeks, with our world turned upside down and shaken vigorously.  We have two teen parents-to-be in shock and trying to figure out what paths their lives are going to follow now.  And a bunch of siblings with varying reactions.  And two sets of grandparents-to-be busy working out details for education (the teens), child care (the baby), living arrangements and how to support the teens and sibs.  Add to that all the people with staunch opinions about what we should do.  Or what the new parents-to-be should or shouldn't do.  I have been tempted to just go into lock-down mode.  Just shut our doors and hold our family close.

And then there are the glimpses of normal.  The friends who are able to just listen.  JUST... not the "just" like "a little thing" but like the "only" thing.  Friends who listen.  Who are able to be there.  Who say, "I'm here if you ever need to talk."  Who go for long walks or offer a cup of tea and an ear.  The friends that call or message just to say they love us.  I thank God for the people who can just be with us as we figure out our new normal.

Ah!  New normal... I first heard that phrase from a friend who was battling cancer.  How the happy, typical days sandwiched, meshed, sometimes collided with chemofunk days.  (For beautiful reading, check out green bananas cancer blog )  Now it seems to fit our lives.  As we emerge from two weeks of wandering around without noticing much of the world around us, we have little bits of normal peeking back into our lives.  Like sitting down to a wonderful dinner with our whole family and a couple of extra teenage friends.  Or hanging all the "winter" wall quilts, dusting, and cleaning up a stack of accumulated magazines.  And bits of New Normal... like chatting with my kiddo about changing the TV room into a bedroom for her and the little one.  Suddenly it is wonderful to plan a new room... bed, rocking chair, crib, changing table.  Or the little bursts of excitement as I look forward to meeting my grandchild!  There is the New Normal of anticipating college as a day student.  My kiddo wanted to attend college within two hours of home before this new path, so looking at colleges within an hour of home is not a disappointment to her.  And, of course, the New Normal of a very different junior and senior year of highschool than anticipated.  But different doesn't have to be worse.  Just different.

And there is the constant.  Love.  Our family.  The friends who love and support us.  The wonderful kids... the ones who live here, the ones who visit here.  This baby will be a blessing.  This baby will be loved.

Soooo... I'm leaving you with one more glimpse of normal.  We were given a couple of huge pumpkins right after halloween.  They sat on our porch as we wandered around in a fog.  Uncarved.  Unfinished.  This morning, walking back up from getting the littler kiddos on the bus, this sight caught my eye.  Hubby took a few minutes last night to carve us some goofy smiles!

Have a happy day!         

still sewing...

Ok... as much fun as I have writing silly tales about our family, I know a few of you are scratching your heads thinking, "where are the QUILTS???"

Ooooops... not a quilt...  But I *have* been sewing.  Really.  A little.  A very little... my other job is playing working as a substitute teacher.  Who would have guessed that I would be in demand during the month of October?  Or that after a couple weeks of subbing nearly every day I would spend a couple of bleary days sneezing and dripping and snuffling my way around the house?  Occupational health hazard, I guess. 

But, look!  After a couple of (healthy) days off, we have a cute little zebra running around our house!  Ok... so I cheated a little.  A discount store near us had these great stripey pajamas on sale for almost nothing.  Seriously... who wouldn't want to snuggle up to their honey at night looking like a honkin' snortin' zebra?  Well, I guess I wouldn't have lined up waiting for those jammies to hit the shelves....  But a cool thing about this store is all the mis-matched sets!  Apparently a few honeys didn't mind the stripey pants.  There were extra tops on sale for just a couple dollars.  And an extra top was all I needed to make a hat and tail to complete the ensemble!  I even have a sleeve left.  Anyone out there need a tail to add to those stripey pants???

And, yes... I'll leave you with a bit of quilting.  I have some great, bright dots and a few fun Kaffe Fassette's prints that I've been reluctant to cut into.  Something about wanting to find the perfect pattern for them.  Like perfect has any chance of happening with me at the rotary cutter!  I finally dragged the buggers out and started slicing away.  Just a simple Jacob's Ladder block, but I love the way the black stands out and the star points kind of flicker around.  First part of one star, then part of another.  Only one dilema.  I just pulled these things out and started piecing.  No idea what for.  Maybe a baby quilt (several friends having babies right now)?  Or a Project Linus quilt?  Scratch all that... two kiddos walked through and fell in love with these bright blocks.  My quilting just got doubled....

Have a happy day! 

Hubby's solution...

Have I mentioned that my husband and I are the parents of teenagers?  Two teenagers, to be precise.  With two more rapidly approaching teen-hood.  Add in the boys that are now quasi-members of our teen zoo and all the buddies that drop in for food hang out here, and there is a distinct lack of brain cells circulating in this house.  Parenting teens is a great exercise in multiplying fractions.  One teen, one brain.  Two teens, half a brain.  Three teens, a quarter of a brain.  The herd of teens running around our house?  Oiy!
 
For the uninitiated to this teen phenomenon, it goes something like this.  Teen brain wakes up and realizes it has a sister.  Down to half power.  Somehow, the brain still manages to get ready for school.  Then the teen body carting this brain around steps onto the school bus where most of the remaining brain cells get sucked into a vortex of co-mingling teen brain.  One of my kids says she sleeps on the way to school.  I think she is actually experiencing a state of shock while her brain tries to adjust to the current loss of function.  Or perhaps she is getting ready to bail out any remanining cells upon entrance to the great brick building called high school.  It really is an amazing phenonenon to behold.  High school functions in some special kind of time warp.  Distinctly separate from the reality most adults inhabit.  The teen brain just doesn't stand a chance.  The vortex of brain cells is too strong.  Soooooo... when the teen steps back off the bus in the afternoon, still reeling from the onslaught of "teen-brain-itis" and with teen friends in tow, we are dealing with something like a genetically altered version of the kid that slept at our house the night before.           

The sharing of brain cells has resulted in, well... teenagers.  With all the prerequisite loss of logic.  And a hefty dose of sass.  With some pouting thrown in for good measure.  My husband has always relegated dealing with teenagers to me.  Something about having all girls and possesing the respective anatomy.  Like estrogen is some mystical element vital to accessing a teen girl's brain.  He fails to understand that there is very little brain left to work with and I am actually an adult and therefore, by nature, thrown out of the teen-brain loop.  But I've gotten used to dealing with teen-brain.  Perhaps a better description is that I'm a bit numb to it.  I've developed a strong resistance to getting sucked into teen reasoning or reacting to erratic behaviour.

I should know better than to leave poor hubby unattended during an outbreak of teen-brain-itis.  Really.  He is inaduquately prepared.  And missing estrogen.  But I left the house briefly last night with one of our teens to return a boy to his actual place of residence.  When I returned, hubby described the horrific aftermath of my less-than-60-minute desertion.  The remaining teen ran into computer problems trying to print out a report.  Functioning on end-of-the-day brain power, this was a serious issue and quickly escalated to falling apart.  Enter unprepared dad.  Sensing rapid loss of control of said situation, he reacted the best he could.  He gave our 16-year-old a TIME OUT.  Pointing to a chair and everything.  Needless to say, this did not go over well with said teen.  By the time I arrived home to plug the printer in, dad and teen were nearing some cosmic eruption of epic proportions.  Yes... I just said, PLUG THE PRINTER IN.

Have I mentioned the vortex that seems to have engulfed our home?  And that it feeds off of teen brains?  And that we will have a third teen in January and a fourth teen in a year and a half?  Multiply by all the additional kids hanging out here and it sure makes for interesting life at the little brown house on the hill....

Sooooo... since I can't seem to catch a picture of a teen detatched from other teens, I'll leave you with a photo of hubby and me.  This was taken a couple of days before the printer issues, so there may be a bit more gray in hubby's hair now....

   

       

Clunk-o-War...

Oldest kid is 16 now.  Oh boy....

Seems like just last week, the BIG QUESTION of the day was what color cup the Victor of the cup-o-war got to use for dinner.  Yup.  Cup wars were big around here.  Whining, shouting, tears, hair-pulling.  Whatever it took to win the covetted cup.  And woe to mom if the pink cup was not washed in time for the meal.  Not that it deterred the battle.  The troops would just duke it out over the second-favorite color... 

But now, the BIG question is about car keys....  I hopped into the driver's seat last week 'cause we were running late to church.  From the excessive amount of pouting that ensued, you would think that I had committed a far greater sin than gyping the kid of 20 minutes of driving time.  Like maybe something along the lines of withholding chocolate.  Or telling the diaper story.

Soooo... for the past few months, Hubby and my dad have been busy checking out Clunkers-by-the-side-of-the-road.  Both guys have been regularly reporting on trucks and cars parked in the weeds.  Oh boy!  A grown-up-male (oxymoron?) version of the cup war.  At least the guys don't have enough hair to resort to hair-pulling....  Really, I didn't take the competition too seriously.  I figured the challenge was just barely heating up.  No time-outs had been issued or even threatened.  I was sure we had months of car one-upmanships to endure before a winner was declared.  Until dad called up mighty proud of himself.  Guess what he found?  Um hmmmm...  Dad is Victor of the clunk-o-war. 

Actually, I'm not even sure it qualifies as a clunker.  Hubby has had every tire and tube and gasket and what-all-else torn off the little white car in his quest to inspect the winning clunk.  And hubby would show no mercy if he felt the clunk was not properly qualified for ferrying his daughter back and forth.  But all he could find was a gasket that needed replacing.  Huh.  Go figure.  A clean win.  With no messy battles or fist-fulls of hair.  Victory by sneak-attack before battle was even fully declared.  Score one for dad!  

I'd celebrate dad's win, but I'm guessing both contestants are out scouring the roadsides for clunk #2.  Second kiddo starts driving on a permit in June...  

And oldest kiddo?  She figures she made out pretty well in the clunk war.  Until it's time to pay for gas.  Maybe then she'll let me drive to church....