I feel like I am emerging from a fog. With sincere apologies for the lack of posting in the past couple of weeks. Ummmm... several weeks. Our family learned some BIG NEWS. Yes, ALL CAPS BIG NEWS. And I just wasn't ready to share. Sooooo... now that the news is out and the fog is lifting, I'm ready to write again. And dust and vaccuum and clean closets and rearrange furniture and shake out rugs and wash beds... Oooops. I diverge. You're waiting for the news, not the to-do-list...
I'm going to be a grandma!
Ummmm... a few years earlier than any of us anticipated. Quite a few years earlier. Hence the fog. It has been a topsy turvy couple of weeks, with our world turned upside down and shaken vigorously. We have two teen parents-to-be in shock and trying to figure out what paths their lives are going to follow now. And a bunch of siblings with varying reactions. And two sets of grandparents-to-be busy working out details for education (the teens), child care (the baby), living arrangements and how to support the teens and sibs. Add to that all the people with staunch opinions about what we should do. Or what the new parents-to-be should or shouldn't do. I have been tempted to just go into lock-down mode. Just shut our doors and hold our family close.
And then there are the glimpses of normal. The friends who are able to just listen. JUST... not the "just" like "a little thing" but like the "only" thing. Friends who listen. Who are able to be there. Who say, "I'm here if you ever need to talk." Who go for long walks or offer a cup of tea and an ear. The friends that call or message just to say they love us. I thank God for the people who can just be with us as we figure out our new normal.
Ah! New normal... I first heard that phrase from a friend who was battling cancer. How the happy, typical days sandwiched, meshed, sometimes collided with chemofunk days. (For beautiful reading, check out green bananas cancer blog ) Now it seems to fit our lives. As we emerge from two weeks of wandering around without noticing much of the world around us, we have little bits of normal peeking back into our lives. Like sitting down to a wonderful dinner with our whole family and a couple of extra teenage friends. Or hanging all the "winter" wall quilts, dusting, and cleaning up a stack of accumulated magazines. And bits of New Normal... like chatting with my kiddo about changing the TV room into a bedroom for her and the little one. Suddenly it is wonderful to plan a new room... bed, rocking chair, crib, changing table. Or the little bursts of excitement as I look forward to meeting my grandchild! There is the New Normal of anticipating college as a day student. My kiddo wanted to attend college within two hours of home before this new path, so looking at colleges within an hour of home is not a disappointment to her. And, of course, the New Normal of a very different junior and senior year of highschool than anticipated. But different doesn't have to be worse. Just different.
And there is the constant. Love. Our family. The friends who love and support us. The wonderful kids... the ones who live here, the ones who visit here. This baby will be a blessing. This baby will be loved.
Soooo... I'm leaving you with one more glimpse of normal. We were given a couple of huge pumpkins right after halloween. They sat on our porch as we wandered around in a fog. Uncarved. Unfinished. This morning, walking back up from getting the littler kiddos on the bus, this sight caught my eye. Hubby took a few minutes last night to carve us some goofy smiles!